I am a dad. To my son, I am "Dada" or "Doddy" (that's how he says it). My son is 22 months old and a wonderful little boy. He is well behaved, loves to laugh and is full of energy. For me, he embodies the vitality of life mixed with reckless abandon to most of life's worries. He will gladly run around the house naked with no shame... oh, to be that free. He will dance anytime and anywhere he hears music. He will sing if he feels like the song in his heart has just gotta come out. He tells stories that typically end in laughing or with the exclamation of "Yea!" I love my son.In fact, I have loved my son even before he was born. I remember feeling him move around and getting the hiccups while still in his mommy's belly. I have loved my son since the day the stick had the "+" sign appear. My heart knew no greater joy and love as the day when I first saw him. I think my heart doubled in size that day. Seriously. I could not have imagined that I could have ever loved someone more... until that glorious day in September. The crazy thing about all of this is that while I am sure he was faintly aware of my presence, he was not aware of the depth of my love for him. I love him with everything in me and I am willing to do anything for him. What do I expect in return? Nothing. Well, something. Let me illustrate.
When I am with my boy and we are playing, sometimes we get worn out and end up having what I refer to as a "Daddy & Jonah Moment." This is when every bit of craziness stops, I scoop him up into my arms and I hold him close pouring words of affirmation and love on him like a waterfall cascading down the side of a mountain. I hold him close so that he knows that in my arms there is comfort, security and love. I speak to him with words of affirmation, approval and love. Now, what if my son responded by deciding that he needed to pay me back for this love as his way of thanking me. Let's say he decided to paint the house (scary thought for a 22 month old). What if he decided that he needed to make me dinner... I'm afraid of that concoction. I do not want him doing a "bunch of stuff" as a thank you. The only response I want from him is to snuggle deeper into my embrace and to live with me in that moment. I want him to look me in the eyes as I talk to him so that he will know that I am revealing my heart to him.
He does not deserve my love. He has done nothing to earn my love. He cannot repay me for my love. This is called grace. This is a picture of what God expects of us and how He approaches us.
The Bible tells us that while we were still sinners, Jesus died for us. While Jonah was only a "+" sign, I loved him. While I was lost in my own self-absorption, God loved me. Jesus died a horrific death on a cross carrying all my junk, brokenness and imperfections so that I could crawl into God's arms and listen to Him speak to me words of affirmation, approval and love. THIS is the response that I think God wants from us- to crawl into His arms and to accept His love.
Just like doing a "bunch of stuff" won't make me love my son more, doing a bunch of religious acts, good deeds and humanitarian efforts won't make God love us any more or any less. The good things that we do for others and the world we live in will happen when we first choose to rest in God's arms and allow Him to love us. When we come to a place of accepting His love for us, then, out of our worship for what Jesus has done, the good fruit of loving others and considering them better than ourselves will happen.
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composed by
dave
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